Evan's Mom (04/30/09)

Evan's Mom: Hat Week?

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Transplants

Why do you have to put your weight on your drivers license?

The Black Lumberjack

"Stop, there's Stacey...hey, she only has one other girl with her!" Black Sumo exclaimed. Black Lumberjack pulls the Escalade up to where the girls were waiting and they hop in.

Stacey immediately hugs Black Sumo and they sit down.

"I thought I said some of your girls, not one of your girls!" Black Sumo says to Stacey.

"Hmmph! This was the best I could do last minute Sumo!" Stacey quips back.

Black Sumo sighs, "It's not important... anyways I'd like the both of you to meet my brother Black Lumberjack." The girls say hello to Black Lumberjack.

"This is my friend Tanisha." Stacey tells them. The brothers say hello and head back towards the Pimping Is My Passion Awards.

"So what award show are you guys taking us too? Tanisha asks rubbing Black Lumberjack's shoulders.

Black Lumberjack looks into the rearview mirror and tells Tanisha, "We are going to the P.I.M.P. Awards, my Girlfriend is there and I have to rescue her." "My brother and I need your help!"

Aww, that's so sweet...Of course we will help you!" Stacey cooed. "What do you need us to do?"

"All you guys need to do is be our dates tonight." Black Sumo chimed in. "We'll take care of the rest!"

They reach the Award show and have their SUV valet parked. Black Lumberjack shows the bouncer the RSVP for the four of them. They are let inside.

They walk in to see hundreds of Pimps and their girls sitting around tables. Black Lumberjack and the rest find an open table and sit down just as the Award show begins.

"Look at all these Pimps...they make me so mad! Black Sumo whispered to Black Lumberjack. "I can't wait till our show starts!"

"Yeah, it can start just as soon as I find out where Tonya is sitting." Black Lumberjack whispered back.

Black Lumberjack scans the room....but he doesn't see Tonya or The Mayor. "He'll be here." he thought to himself.
"Pimp of the Year is the top honor. When he goes to get his award, I'll be waiting".

Cutting Room Floor

The original three hour version of The Blues Brothers was split into two parts with a musical intermission but given complaints by theater owners at a preview Universal Studios asked director John Landis to trim the film. This scene shot on the Kennedy Expressway near Montrose Avenue was part of the chase sequence following Joliet Jake and Elwood Blues on their way to pay property taxes to the Cook County Assessor for the St. Helen of the Blessed Shroud Orphanage.

Behind the Story...

Evan's Mom (04/23/09)

Evan's Mom: Flight Week (pt. 2)


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http://www.michiganhighways.org/indepth/michigan_left.html

The Black Lumberjack

The scene at the Pimping Is My Passion Awards was a crazy one. There were large crowds surrounding everyone entering the Award show. You had Pimps posing for photos on the red carpet with their "escorts". There was even one pimp who was showering his girl with cash! He was wearing an outfit made entirely out of dollar bills! "Remind me to squash that sucka later..." Black Sumo exclaimed.

Black Lumberjack was scanning the crowds looking for The Mayor... and more importantly Tonya.

"I don't see her among the crowds Black Sumo." Black Lumberjack stated.

"I guess we should hang for a while and wait for this circus to die down a bit before we get set-up. Do we have everything we need?" Black Lumberjack asked Floyd and Ronnie.

"Yup, your axe is in this case, and we have all the smoke bombs and rope on us as well." Ronnie stated.

"Good!" Black Lumberjack said. "Black Sumo and I will go in now and go find some seats by the rear exits."

"Hey! We can't go in just us two!" Black Sumo shouted. "We'll get spotted for sure! Let me make a call to some friends."
Black Sumo pulls out his cell phone and begins dialing.

"Yo Stacey, whatchu doing right now?....You want to go to an award show tonight?....I thought so. Why don't you round up some of your girls and we will meet you in an hour....Oh and put on your sexiest outfits!"

"Good idea!" Black Lumberjack said while giving Black Sumo a fist pound. This will be the perfect diversion.

Ronnie speaks up, "Awesome guys, just drop us off first so we can get ready, then you two can go pick the girls up and get inside the awards."

Black Lumberjack drives around to the back of the building. Floyd and Ronnie jump out with the equipment and go find a place to hide out.

Black Sumo rolls his window down and tells the two brothers, "Alright guys we'll let you know when we get back so that we can straight-up roll on these Pimps!

Black Lumberjack then speeds off smiling, knowing that he is so close to getting his girl back.

Cutting Room Floor

Written as Ridley Scott's inroad back to directing science fiction after the box office flop of his Blade Runner, Thelma and Louise was intended as two films. Part one as released is mostly intact as scripted but fades to white before the cliffhanger ending.

In Star Trek IV Kirk and his crew return to 1986 in order to capture whales prior to their extinction so that they will be able to communicate with aliens destroying the Earth in the future. Part 2 of Thelma and Louise was to be Star Trek VI - The Ribbons of Paradox. In that script, it turns out that a paradox was created in 1986 when Spock gave the Vulcan neck-pinch to a punk that had given him the finger on a San Francisco bus. In the future Spock concludes that the only way to undue this paradox and restore balance to the universe is to save Thelma and Louise and take them back to 1986 New York and Los Angeles to teach a punk in each of those cities some manners in tandem with the other time traveling Spock. Needless to say, Louise and Kirk get along famously. Part one ends as a tractor beam from the USS Enterprise stops their 1966 Thunderbird in mid air and Thelma and Louise are beamed aboard.

Behind the Story

And the first bidet was created...

Evan's Mom (04/16/09)

Evan's Mom: Pit Week



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Tax Day

The Black Lumberjack

"Today's the Pimpin Is My Passion Awards!" Black Sumo shouted excitedly. "Those Pimps are gonna pay!"

"Whoa, slow your roll Black Sumo!" Floyd said laughingly. "We can't just roll into the award show. They'll surely have security at the doors!"

"Should we try to get onto a list?" Black Lumberjack asked.

"Already done...!" Ronnie stated while holding up 2 RSVP invitations. "You and Black Sumo should be able to get into the event using these. Floyd and I will just wait outside around back. Then one of you just has to let us in from the inside."

"Yeah..." Floyd chimed in, "Now the only thing you guys will need are some disguises!"

"Some disguises?" Black Sumo asked, his interests suddenly perked. I know just the place...Let's go already!"

The four men leave the cabin and head over to the place that Black Sumo so enthusiastically suggested.

"Ha-haa-hee! You look so stupid Black Lumberjack!" Black Sumo laughed.

"Hmmm! You look like a Hippo with a suit on! Black Lumberjack quipped back.
"Perfect, you guys look perfect. I don't think anyone will know who you guys are." Floyd says cutting the two men off before their tempers began to flare. "We have only a few hours before everything begins. I think we better get these outfits and go."

The four men leave and head towards the city for the 15th Annual Pimping Is My Passion Awards.

Cutting Room Floor

In the summer of 2005 Rush Limbaugh ran a radio contest in which he offered to buy a Big Boy restaurant franchise and pay all start up costs for any Floridian able to justify to him why they deserved to win. Rudy Bob Russell and his wife Crystal are now the proud owner operators of the Sanford, Florida Big Boy. They were able to win his confidence because before moving to Florida to take care of Rudy's aging father they had managed a Big Boy in Valley View, Michigan. They sealed the deal by explaining rumors they'd heard of Limbaugh's Big Boy passions from some franchise owners they knew in Michigan. They guaranteed they'd get things right in Florida.

At the time of the filming of Fahrenheit 9/11 there were no Big Boy restaurants in Limbaugh's home state of Florida. While traveling for work between Florida and New York on his private jet Limbaugh would often take lunch layovers in the Traverse City, Michigan Big Boy because he was particularly fond of the way they serve the Big Boy Famous Onion Rings.

Traverse City Michigander Michael Moore shares Limbaugh's passions for Big Boy. They both regularly order the The Super Big Boy Combination with a side of Our Famous Onion Rings. Rush goes for the Strawberry Shake. Moore gets the Chocolate Malt. It was really only a matter of time before the wait staff arranged for the two to meet.

Their first meeting took place informally during the filming of Fahrenheit 9/11 when the two spent a long lunch discussing how they were each first introduced to Big Boy and how their road trips are occasionally planned to include stops in states with Big Boy restaurants. Moore's film crew was with him on lunch because they were all heading to Flint to interview town folk regarding military recruiting tactics. The film crew was able to get some candid footage of the two men enjoying a post lunch tour of the restaurant. Although the footage shows Moore and Limbaugh joking with one another and having what appears to be a great afternoon Limbaugh would not allow the footage to be included in the film.

Behind the Story

And the Easter Bunny was Created...

Evan's Mom (04/09/09)

Evan's Mom: POWER Week (now featuring plagiarisim)
...sorry Transplants...



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Transplants

MSU gets their but kicked, but at least one person had some good come out of it!

The Black Lumberjack

Black Lumberjack and Black Sumo were sitting at the cabin waiting on Floyd and Ronnie to arrive.

"So BLJ, do you have any ideas on how we are going to save Tonya?"

Black Sumo asked anxiously. Black Sumo couldn't wait to get back at The Mayor and his guys for what they did to Black Lumberjack and Tonya.

"Well, I was thinking we would just crash their party." Black Lumberjack shows Black Sumo a flyer for the 15th Annual Pimpin' Is My Passion awards.

"This is happening tomorrow, I know that The Mayor and his men will all be there. He's a nominee of the award for Best Pimp."

"Pimps are nothing but street scum!" Black Sumo yells while slamming his fist on the table, breaking it in the process. "We wipe them out, I guarantee no one will miss em'."

There's a knock at the door, and its Floyd & Ronnie. They entered while carrying a large case and some other items. "We brought some rope and smoke bombs for when we go up against the pimps."

"I don't need anything but my fists!" Black Sumo exclaims.

"What's in the case?" Black Lumberjack wanted to know.

"Open it up!" Floyd says with a smile on his face. The case contained some parts that looked like they assembled together. Black Lumberjack began putting the items together and when he finished, he held in his hand what resembled a large battle axe! Black Lumberjack longingly gazes at the axe with a sly grin on his face.
"I have a feeling that I'll be doing a lot of choppin' tomorrow....but this time, it ain't gonna be no trees...

Cutting Room Floor

While establishing camp at Fort Sedgwick, Union Army Officer Lieutenant John Dunbar acquires dysentery from the stagnant waters of the nearby spring. Though Dunbar continues to scout the plains around the fort his days are increasingly interrupted by the nature's pressing call. After establishing a close friendship with Kicking Bird, the medicine man of the neighboring Lakota Sioux camp, Dunbar is eventually cured of his dysentery by the healing powers of native medicine. This doesn't stop Kicking Bird from having a little friendly fun while giving Dunbar the Lakota name "Runs Often to the Tall Grass."

The first cut of the film, clocking in at 236 minutes, was deemed too long by Orion Pictures executives so director Kevin Costner reluctantly cut all scenes relating to Dunbar's dysentery to bring the film down to a more audience friendly 181 minutes.

The Michael Blake novel from which "Dances with Wolves" is adapted retained the name "Runs Often to the Tall Grass" for the first and second printing but following the success of the movie its title was changed.

Behind the Story

The start of Proctology

Evan's Mom (04/02/09)

Evan's Mom: Water Week - Pt. 2


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Transplants

Bathing suit season is almost here!